Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Almost 1 Year

I know it's been awhile - but I have not wanted to officially sign off quite yet. I will still blog from time to time. Hopefully will not let almost 4 months go by like I did.

I was walking Piper this morning and letting my mind wander, like I always do, and my thoughts turned to Brenan, like they always do. It's been almost one year since my brother passed. It feels like it was just yesterday, to tell you the truth. When someone so close to you dies, it's as if time stands still - it doesn't matter that so many days have passed, the loss is still there feeling as fresh as it did on May 25, 2009. The gaping wound that was left in my heart when he died is still there. It's trying to heal, it really is... but then I pick at the scab and it starts to bleed again. I think of Brenan before he was diagnosed, missing my strong big brother acting like a goofball and annoying me. I think of our time in the hospital and seeing him get weaker and weaker. Memories float all around me from different times in our life every single day and I find new things to be sad about - or sometimes something to smile about. And I know that as years go by, my wound will not be as deep. It will still be there, it just won't hurt quite as bad. I won't think of my brother every hour - maybe just a couple times a day. But it's this transition and healing that makes me even more sad.

Monday, February 15, 2010

This is Jess...signing off

Well, I guess that it's kind of obvious...I'm really out of things to say here on this blog. I'm pretty sure that I've posted all the videos and information I can think of--and the idea of just posting random stuff about my life seems rather self-indulgent.

That being said, I am signing off the blog. It's been an amazing journey of emotions. The support provided through comments has been extremely uplifting and helpful to me in my healing. Thanks to all who have followed the blog and supported our family through love and grief.

Stay tuned to see if Elisa decides to continue posting...

Many thanks and lots of love to all! Jess

PS: I may be launching a new blog about education. I am very interested in local advocacy efforts regarding the cuts to state funding for education programs (cuts to Early Childhood Block Grant, the Gifted Grant, and Full-Day Kindergarten). I will probably be launching a blog about this shortly. It is not likely to interest anyone outside of education, but I will post the address here whenever I decide to launch.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

State of the Union Info

Hey all! The "State of the Union" was really terrific tonight. Here's a link to the main points if you missed the speech. State of the Union--Comments Summary

Here's also some video clips posted on CNN. Video of the "State of the Union" Speech.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Splash's pond upgrade

Well...not much to tell around here. It's been raining and crazy storming here in Arizona though. There were even tornado warnings yesterday! Splash wanted me to share his pond upgrade with everyone...an infinity pool (overflowing actually!)

Friday, January 15, 2010

Clean Air Act--Update

Just a little more info: I've been getting a lot of emails from the listserves I belong to so I looked into the amendment a bit further. Here's the text for the Murkowski Amendment (it's less than 2 pages). Check it out and make your voice heard using the link in previous post.

By the way, I also found this information about Lisa Murkowski's acceptance of contributions from Coal companies. Check it out...a whopping $253,000 since 2003. Sourcelink here.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Clean Air Act--protect the EPA

Well, I rarely post anything remotely political and would certainly never want to offend anyone. However, I feel that this is an important environmental issue that transcends politics and should concern us all. On January 20th, Congress is voting on an amendment that contains a rider which will limit EPA's enforcement funding for the Clean Air Act. The bill itself is likely to pass...unfortunately carrying this rider with it. HERE is information about the proposed changes to EPA. HERE is a WSJ article about it from back in December. (And HERE is information from Lisa Murkowski's press release confirming her involvement. Don't be confused by deceptive wording about "limiting government" here--these are just buzz words. The intention is to limit the EPA by suspending some powers of recent Clean Air legislation.)

Most Americans don't realize how much coal is actually burned in the United States. Click HERE to read true information about coal in the US. Americans think about coal being burned in China...not here. But there is much information to be learned about coal in this country, the pollution it adds to the environment, and the reason why the US continues to be "behind" in adopting greener policies. Bottom line? America has a lot of coal resources and Big Coal companies are making a lot of money. Sadly, Big Coal companies fund many political campaigns in order to influence politicians. Don't think so? Look right HERE.

American activism might one day encourage politicians to revise our environmental policies. Until then, click HERE to sign a petition to encourage your local congressmen to vote against a bill that limits the power of the EPA. (This part only takes a second).

PS Hopefully, I've found good facts in putting this together. If anyone has more info about this pro/con, I hope that you'll post it in the comments section by clicking below. Thanks!

Sunday, January 10, 2010

The Search for Happiness

Hello cyberland! Hope that everyone is having a good New Year. Being done with Grad School is amazing! I've been doing my best to goof off: playing guitar everyday, finishing art projects, renting movies, catching up on recent news, spending time with friends, reading quality literature, getting to the gym, and promising myself that I'll practice some piano at some point, too! Sigh. This was my first typical weekend that was homework free. I still have that nagging feeling like I should be doing something else...it's great to finally have some freedom to do the things that I want ;)

My ASU job starts up again in a week. I'm grading two classes this semester and definitely looking forward to the ongoing stimulation of reading OTHER people's homework and papers! (with no deadlines hanging over my own head) I got paired up with my very favorite professor from the Early Childhood program: Billie Enz. She runs amazing, challenging classes that are well-designed to apply to everyday practices. She also showed me much kindness, flexibility, and genuine caring as I was trying to get homework/papers completed while living in the hospitals. I am looking forward to the opportunity to continue working with her! Yea ;)

I wanted to share a really great messsage from church last week. It's about happiness and completely sums up my happiness theory: I choose to be happy. It's a great message. Hope that you get a chance to listen--and that people enjoy when I post this type of stuff.

"THE SEARCH FOR HAPPINESS"--Brian T. Anderson, 1/3/10 (Audio and Notes)

xoxo Jess

Friday, January 1, 2010

I heart Baltimore ;)

Well, there is no doubt about it...I left my heart in Baltimore. Not only was it great time with my dear friends Kristy and Robert (who I don't get to see nearly enough and miss all the time)...but their 14 month old son certainly swept me off my feet! Robert D is such an amazingly smart little guy and he is so much fun to be around. It would be hard to say if the four of us had more fun sight-seeing or relaxing at home. For me, it was the perfect combination. Hanging with Kristy and the Roberts was a much needed repose from the craziness of the last year.


We spent our first full day in Washington DC. It was really impressive to see such iconic historical landmarks in person. There were holiday decorations everywhere, enhancing the spirit and making it especially fun. And, we were fortunate to have absolutely beautiful weather that day!

The rest of the days, we spent a lot of time in downtown Baltimore. It's about a fifteen minute (relaxed) walk from Kristy & Robert's house. There were some windy and rainy days that somewhat halted our ambitious plans, but we were pretty happy hanging around the house chatting and playing with Robert D. We went for a lot of walks and took advantage of the fun places to eat in the neighborhood and near the harbor. New Year's Eve was rainy (or "misty" as they call it there) so we hung around inside until a few minutes before midnight. Then, we hiked up to Federal Hill to watch the fireworks in the harbor. It was beautiful for about 15 minutes and then we high-tailed it home where it was warmer.


So, I am already happily dreaming of the next trip to Baltimore. Until then, I've got a pretty good plan for getting Robert D to Arizona (see below! ;)

See all my photos and notes by clicking on this link here: BALTIMORE PHOTO ALBUM.

Alaska Photos

Alright--don't be too surprised when these photos don't look like Baltimore! ;) I am trying to show some self-restraint in posting these photos first before I upload and post a link to the Baltimore photos (which is what I really want to do right now!) I've been needing to post the Alaska photos for so long! Now that I finally have some time, I am determined to share them first.

You may remember way back to the summer when Elisa and I got to go and see our Aunt Lavonne, Uncle Fred, and their family in Alaska. It was an amazing trip and these photos prove it! Enjoy.

ALASKA SLIDESHOW LINK

More about Baltimore tonight or tomorrow ;)

Monday, December 28, 2009

A Week of Holiday Fun

And now I'm back to reality - just as Jess gets to leave on a nice little holiday retreat!

My parents and I spent this last week with our family in Minnesota. It was filled with snow, new experiences, and old memories. I can't believe it's already over - it feels like we were just counting down the days for our fun Christmas vacation to begin.

On Monday, the 21st, we celebrated Brenan's birthday with loved ones and Brenan's favorite - spice cake. We had people over at my cousin Cindy's from both the Eiler side and the LeRoy side of the family. We talked about our favorite memories of Brenan and toasted to the great life he led.

During our holiday week, we got to see several inches of snow fall (Not sure if they were categorized as "blizzard-sized" flakes but there sure were a lot of them! I learned from my cousin Jacob that only certain sized snow flakes actually "count."), plow and shovel snow, go sledding and snowmobiling, and have a snowball fight. This was our first white Christmas in a really long time and it was a great way to celebrate the holiday in a new way.

On Christmas day, most of the family (those who were able to get through the piles of snow!) headed to Lavonne and Fred's house for dinner and family fun. The family presented us with a gift they had been working on for a few weeks, which was amazing and truly represented the spirit of Brenan and Christmas. Many of the LeRoys contributed money and toys to donate to the Children's Hospital in Brenan's name. To document the occasion, they put all the correspondence with the hospital and with each other, pictures, and thoughts about Brenan in a scrapbook titled "The Life of Brenan." Each family member created a page for Brenan or wrote a letter to him to be compiled in his life book. Not only did they make a HUGE contribution, one of the biggest to the hospital in recent times, but they created a way for us all to remember Brenan and what he represented - selflessness and giving to those who are in need. My parents and I are overwhelmed with emotion when we think about what our family has done to support us and remember Brenan. We know how awful it is to have a loved one in the hospital, especially over the holidays, and we hope that the contribution brightened the children's day!

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE GIFT, LeROYS!

My pictures from the trip will be posted soon! I hope everyone had as merry of a Christmas as we did and I can't wait to see my family in Minnesota again soon. Being surrounded by you all during this time has made it a bit easier to cope with the void of not having Brenan here with us.

Merry Christmas, Brenan. Your baseball cards are on the mantel just as they always have been and will continue to be year after year.

Friday, December 25, 2009

Merry Christmas to All!

Merry Christmas to everyone! Tomorrow I'm headed to Baltimore to see my BFF from high school (Kristy), her husband Robert and their son, Robert D. They are flying me out as birthday present. Hooray! So excited. Everyone have a good week! -jess-

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Merry Christmas Eve

Merry Christmas Eve to everyone! I'm excited to share a link to the webpage for the "Following the Master" series. About a year ago, the senior pastor at my church did an amazing series about Jesus, talking about who he really was and teaching a great deal about the time period when he lived. As I have said to many, it completely changed my faith, the way that I think about Jesus, and the pride I feel for being a Christian. It really made an impact on Brenan and I and gave us steadfast faith. Since I am always recommending this series to people and forwarding links--I was excited to find one place where the church has all the links posted together.

The web address is: http://vineyardnorthphoenix.com/section/339

From the depths of my heart, I hope that you take the time to listen to it. Start from the bottom link and work upward chronologically to listen in order. It just might change your life and faith, too. Peace and blessings to all. Merry Christmas! -jess-

Monday, December 21, 2009

Christmas "Eve" Services

Hey! If anyone is looking for a place to go for Christmas services, you all know by now how much I love my church! Best news is that there are services on both the 23rd or the 24th. So if your Christmas Eve plans prevent you from getting to church, take the time to go the night before.

Here's info for anyone who is interested. CLICK HERE.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Thankful for December 21st

Tomorrow, I will celebrate Brenan's birthday and thank God for the blessing that he was to my life. I am so touched by the impact that he made on us all, and I'm so proud to have been his girl.

As sad as I feel sometimes, I am often overcome by the happiest memories. There were so many amazing memories--the big memories like our wedding and the inbetween memories of daily life. Brenan's good nature and love for life enriched everything around him. Even without him here, that richness lasts on and blesses me daily.

I thought that this might be a good way for us all to celebrate as we remember his birthday. Post your happy memory of Brenan (by clicking "Comments" below) and let us all celebrate his life.

I'm Still Yours--Kutless (another great song by this band)

Escaping the Bait of Offense

Well, I am officially enjoying rest and relaxation. I turned in all my grades for my ASU job this morning (at like 4:30am!) and I'm kind of out of it today. Still, the euphoria of being deadline-free at the moment is something I haven't felt in a long time. Yesterday, I had some friends over to my house to celebrate graduation and catch up from the many months that I've been a recluse. What a treat...I had a great time!

I am so excited to share something that I think will make a big impact for many people. It is a rare occasion that Thora Anderson, my senior pastor's wife, speaks at church. Last weekend she gave an amazing message that really impacted me. She is a wise woman with much clarity. Her message is called: Escaping the Bait of Offense. It's about the importance of maintaining relationships by avoiding taking offense. It really freed me from some past things that I have been struggling to resolve. I honestly think that you will feel the same way if you take the time to listen. It is really terrific life advice--whether or not you go to church! (And if you do listen, post comments to encourage other people to do the same!)

Click here: Escaping the Bait of Offense
Click Here for the Notes
(The audio file takes about 60 seconds to load)

Here's some of the big points that I took away (But take the time to listen for yourself!):
*It is impossible that the opportunity to be offended will not come in life--it's all about how we choose to respond.
*When people pick up offense, they themselves stumble and fall.
*Proverbs 10:18 "When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable."
*Offense is like kryptonite to Superman: It drains us of our spiritual vitality.
*Offense causes us to miss the blessings of God in our life (especially relationships with others).

So, as Thora says: "Tis the season to have lots of opportunities to be offended." Take a minute to listen to this wise advice and consider how you will respond to others when given the opportunity to either get offended or respond in grace.

If you do not already have QuickTime, you may need to download it (free) HERE.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

A few pics

Well, a lot of the pictures must be on my bro's camera, but here's a couple of cute ones until I get the rest! ;) Am I a lucky girl or what? So much love and support!

We went to dinner ahead of time at a fun restaurant called Boston's where I used to eat during my undergrad. They make great pizza and pasta. Mmmm... pizza. They used to have an amazing Chicken Thai pizza--but you'll just have to take my word for it because they don't have it on the menu anymore! Boo.
Me and Trav

Party party party!
One year from now...it will be Jamie in the gown, graduating with her M.Ed. in English!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

WOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!

Well, I am so very happy to tell you that I just got home from graduation! I came straight home and updated my resume! Funny, right? It just seemed like an appropriate way to mark the occasion ;)

As the euphoria wears off, I have to stop and thank everyone who has supported me in love, faith, and prayers through this very difficult time. It doesn't seem possible that it is finally OVER!

It was a very special night. It meant so much to me that my mom, Travis and Jamie, Bruce, Elisa, Uncle Les, and Uncle Russ came out to celebrate. I will try to post some pics tomorrow. The excitement is starting to wear off and I think that I will finally be able to sleep...a good, long, long sleep. Thank goodness I am not working tomorrow! I turned in all my progress reports today and left school with a big "Winter Break" smile on my face.

I heard this great song on the radio on my way home. Kind of felt like it was the perfect song to describe the road to get here...and the road from here...and maybe the road of life in general. It has a great line that I am already holding close to heart: "Don't you give up now, the sun will soon be shining. You've gotta face the clouds to find the silver lining."

Love and thanks! Jess

Kutless-What Faith Can Do

Friday, December 11, 2009

Almost finished

Well, I just submitted the last assignment of my Masters degree program. I should officially be eligible for graduation starting....well, like 2 minutes ago. I am so overcome with exhaustion, euphoria, and disbelief. What a long road it has been.

Many thanks to all for the love, support, and encouraging messages. They have been much needed! I submitted my final Action Research Project on Tuesday night. I've spent the last 16 weeks looking at increasing comprehension of picture books for preschool children by acting out the book with simple props in order to bring the story to life. It has been an amazing project that my students just absolutely loved. I feel that they got so much out of these books and they continue to ask to read them aloud. I have even seen kids reading the books to themselves and to others in the book area. What a fun way to increase appreciation for reading! (And it gave me the opportunity to share two of my favorite books ;)

Well, it should get better from here. Graduation is one week from today. I think that I'll pinch myself when I get the diploma in the mail. Wow. But I'm trying to stay focused on the other stuff going on. All of the ASU students are in the process of submitting their final projects so I've been busy grading papers for the ASU job. Things continue to be crazy at the preschool. I have six IEP's to finish and hold in the next week. I've been there really late--and I'm actually up late working on one right now. Progress reports are due as well so I've been busy collecting data and getting those written up.

However...one week from today, I will be on winter break. I'm not planning to go to school on Friday since graduation gets out rather late that night. Come on, come on! Hope this week goes by fast and I get all my work done! ;) Love to all! Jess